Self-Confidence as a mind tool

Self-confidence has become the most explorable topic of stress management on the internet. Things that were common among people earlier have now become a stress factor. Why we have created such a complicated environment now? The world demands a lot of things from human beings that make us struggle with the outside world for being competent. While the process of competency endures, we tend to lose the self-confidence during the transition. Yes, building the competency is necessary for the sustenance, but at the same time, we always need to ensure whether we are losing ourselves in the process. The world never demands to be competent by losing ourselves in the flow. Maybe we are not aware of what the term means generally. Do we?

Self-confidence is one of the most important characteristics of any human being. It is all about how we trust our own acumen and potential, and that we value ourselves and feel ethical, regardless of any shortcomings or what the society may believe about us. While we are competing for the sustenance, we forget to be alert and conscious about our own thoughts. I recollect reading about "high-performance habits" wherein, it is mentioned that every thought we allow to enter in our mind should be sieved with acuity. Today, during this unfortunate pandemic, where we are being conscious of our health and also about what we allow inside our homes, it is also necessary to monitor and purge what we allow ourselves in mind too. Low-confidence is such a poisonous thing, that conquers us without our own recognition.

We get down to impress the opposite sex to fall into a relationship with that person. Every time we do it, we are making ourselves to be a part of the pool of available singles on earth which concomitantly doubt our own self-confidence and self-respect. The hardest truth that I listened from a podcast on relationships is to be an "asshole" in the approach! Seems terrific and strikes us like a thunder-bolt, isn't it? All it means that we need to be our own selves with self-esteem and aplomb in whatever we do. Gone are the days, where people fall for the opposite sex based on physical attraction alone. Now, the trend is to be independent and mentally attractive with the vibe you create with your presence. Let your infectious energy do the talking!

Dubious Respect: Patriarchal ideology revisited!

We live in a world where we have restricted women to be under societal norms. Societal norms, as we call it, can be viewed as cultural products where we expect an individual to have just a basic knowledge of what a woman does, and what is expected out of her. Though societal norms is a broad topic we have made it a synonym to patriarchal ideology. The society has a wrong notion about feminism and women empowerment and has already concluded that they are modern topics like that of self-love which is relevant to Gen Y. But we fail here to understand that women have been there right from the beginning along with men. So its high time to understand the genuine objectives conveyed through these topics.

We have witnessed many campaigns with posters denoting a woman with ten hands each holding the responsibilities she takes in society. But have we meticulously implanted that image in our soul? If so, we would not have seen cases of disrespect towards women in this patriarchal society. I am not blaming or discriminating a specific gender here, but I am to remove the parochial thought in each one of us about women. Let's begin with the differences we have created between genders in society. On the first place, why have the differences arisen? A male or a female embryo develops just with a combination of two types of chromosomes. If we try to differentiate genetically, a female embryo goes with XX chromosomes(homogametic) and a male embryo forms with XY chromosomes(heterogametic). I wish to apprehend cautiously whether have we started differentiating and demeaning a particular gender arising from the chromosome combination? The differences have multiplied so much that we have callously ignored the power of women. We have various movies, articles and books throwing a punch at patriarchy, but we have not received with full vigour. I have seen certain men who do not wish to comment on female-centric films because of their bigoted, parti pris notions. These beliefs have left me with a sense of trepidation. On one side, we help the poor and underprivileged to be treated equally, while on the other side, we have cocooned our women under patriarchal approach. The situation gets worst after a woman's marriage. More than love and understanding, marriage has commercially been a tie with a multitude of securities and demands. In this constitution of marriage, women are conditioned to remain quietly at the receiving end of everyday patriarchal violence. We expect the women to "move on" and reconcile for the sake of family and relatives, right from unfaltering contentment in domesticity and holding her dreams in abeyance to the uneasiness of being taken for granted in marriage.

For any human being, the first and foremost for which we have all been striving hard in our lives is for happiness and respect. These are the two things that every individual deserves inevitably in a lifetime. As a strong note, a woman should retaliate when her respect and dignity are questioned- a docile insurgent on the margins!

Perspective redefined

To start off with "perspective" is a huge matter itself I guess! But there are a few fallacies regarding this subject. Perspective is generally considered as strong but it has its own meaning for different people; again "Perspective" of the intended meaning.

When we say "Perspective", do you think it is real? Whether such things are given a deep thought?? Generally, we do look at the world through our pair of glasses and interpret a particular thing based on our ideas, our motivations, and beliefs that we hold true. But it is customary to know that perspective may not hold true for others as each of us has different experiences, beliefs over the same thing. But what can be done so that different viewpoints do not collide with each other!

Communication can be effective only when we are able to understand, empathize with the content of what is being communicated. Perspective holds a very important role in communication; be it in a letter, a message, an email, or even direct face to face communication as the communicator delivers different interpretations of the subject being discussed. Most of the communications fail solely due to the difference in outlook, mainly in friendships, relationships, and also when working for our team at work. Generally, these perspectives may differ among the communicators based on the values they hold, their upbringing, and so on. Seen from a different standpoint, an action may seem so undesirable, but in the same way, it can be desirable and achievable. All we can do while we communicate is to operate within all these viewpoints and ensure an efficacious communication. In relationships, holding on to once own standpoint can heat up the conversation and lead to nowhere. Yes! none of the relationships are perfect and we do argue with our partners as we all have a different point of view over the same thing, but it is also quite important to know about how much we need to hold on to our perspective so that the communication doesn't get to a disadvantage! Think before you leap!! :)